We’re now into the second half of the charity project and I’m proud to say I haven’t missed a day. I’ll not miss a day, this was originally my idea and with my mates staying committed there’s no way I can pussy out. The donations plateaued last week but that’s to be expected, after all the eager beavers get their donations sent away and we’ve all harassed our families to donate then it’s up to us to raise more funds. We’ve got the goal of $1,500 but obviously we just want the absolute most we can for The Water Project.
I’m questioning why I made the name ‘Privileged to Help’, I mean I know why I made the name but I don’t know if it was necessary. I suppose I just wanted a banner which me and my friends could all fall under as OUR project rather than the actual charity itself.
This is the first proper idea I’ve ever really manifested and it feels class, the limiting factor is linear thinking. How many times have you talked yourself out of doing something you think would be brilliant? I always find an excuse or hit a wall when I’m developing ideas and I think that comes from school. In school there’s so many rules and we’re so institutionalised that I think as teens we think there’s all this red tape everywhere that prevents us putting plans into action. That’s how I felt anyway until this year, when I dropped out of university I was all alone for the first real time, I didn’t belong to anyone, I didn’t have an institution to identify with. I had this sudden realisation that literally anything is possible, there’s no restrictions on our own free will and they definitely don’t prepare you for that moment in school. I suppose it’s for good reason, I think if 16 year old me got wind of this revelation that you can do whatever you want in life, I probably would have given up on school and never would’ve pushed myself to get my A-Levels, which I found really hard by the way and I spent 3 years doing them.
Perhaps it’s because we ram our 18 year olds into these major life choices and tell them that they must attend uni or else they’re behind, it is so messed up. You aren’t behind if you don’t go to uni straight away, that idea seems so ridiculous to me now but at the time that’s honestly how they make you feel,they make life seem like a rat race. They make it seem as though you absolutely have to go to university and go get a job afterwards, but as adults we all know that isn’t true.
The truth is that you can do whatever you want in life, literally, so long as it’s within the law and it doesn’t harm anybody then you can do it.
I have enough money in my bank account right now to fly to Biratnagar Airport in Nepal tomorrow morning. I could, if I wanted to, board that flight and begin looking for work in Nepal, using my savings to pay lodgings until I earn enough to fund my own living situation. Totally possible, seems impossible and far fetched but I could do that 100%, there’s nothing preventing me from at least trying. Obviously, it would entail leaving my whole family behind, my girlfriend, all my mates and the country I love, so I wouldn’t do it, but I could if I wanted to.
That’s the important part is that once you leave school, the amount of people that would chase you down if you went missing drops dramatically, I felt sad for a bit about this – it’s weird feeling less important than before, but now I love it, I feel such a freedom to live my life on my terms. I mean it is a pretty drastic change to go from 6+ hours of school for roughly 200 days a year for 14 years to no school, no days a year. If you’re struggling to follow me it’s just that you’re expected in school every school day and once you leave school, nobody’s expecting you anymore. Now, obviously I have a job in a primary school now so I do get to feel a part of that community again which is special and heartwarming. That said, if I stopped showing up they wouldn’t call my parents in for a chat, they’d sack me – in school you’re irreplaceable but not anymore.
Wow, that’s a perfect example of how my mind works to go from manifesting ideas to losing my job, I think consequentially.
To round up that thought though I’ll say this, in school you need that imaginary red tape to prevent you from straying from education and discipline, once you’re out of school though I think it’s important to remove all of that red tape and explore what the possibilities are before diving straight into another institution with its’ own kind of red tape, albeit less. If you carry these mental boundaries set by education into your adult life I think it can probably hinder your ability or motivation to properly carry out and execute plans. It limits your thinking so much, my girlfriend, Katie, was giving off to me for not being able to decide what I want to do in life and she was getting pissed off because I was jumping from one idea to the next, literally from binman one week to journalist the next, but that’s seriously how I feel, I’m overwhelmed with opportunity. So, this charity project is an attempt by me to not think as much, to stop spending so much time doing research and instead to just go and do it and learn as I go along.
Just as a side note to this, me and one of the teachers in my school were talking last year, we were talking about displays and I was basically being a bit of a perfectionist about it as I like to be. Anyway, she said to me ‘I used to be like that but then I realised that’s just not how life works.’ I recall thinking, ‘Noted, but surely you could just be a perfectionist for the rest of your life and then life does work like that.’ Yeah, I was wrong, she was so right, the world doesn’t work like that. The key is to go and do, as a perfectionist I have a problem doing something unless it’s ‘proper’, the word I like to use to describe a feeling I get which I’m sure some of you will understand. Truth is, you’re better doing something and ending up with 75% of what you imagined than to spend the whole time planning and never get anything done. Of course, there are some hybrid overachievers who are able to plan to perfection and then execute, but who likes those people? I don’t and I aspire to be one, being liked is so overrated.