Here we go again, it’s now day 28 and I’m getting nearer to the end, thank fuck. We reached our goal of $1,750, so I’d like to just thank everyone reading this that donated, it means the world to me. I’m so proud of my mates and myself, what was just an idea has come and will soon be gone, hopefully it’s not the last idea I ever execute.
Tonight, Mike Tyson fights for the first time in 15 years, everyone is excited obviously because he’s one of the greatest boxers to have ever lived. Here’s what I’ll be writing about though, he wrote in his book that he punched his wife in 1989 and to add insult to injury, he said he didn’t regret it. That’s pretty crazy stuff, from what I understand, his wife at the time was Robin Givens and I think she was a bit of a bitch. Nevertheless, the heavyweight champion of the world should not be punching his wife. See, nobody will remember that though and when he dies he’ll be celebrated regardless. That’s not that bad, I do take issue with the celebration of George Best though, he was the world’s biggest prick, not to be celebrated as a role model by anyone. Yes, Mr Best was good at football but as for life, he was a complete arsehole, he was an alcoholic scumbag who beat women and cheated in every relationship he ever had. Jesus, the fact that he got his own fucking banknote puts me off leading a moral life. If you can lead a life that he did and get away with it, it makes you think what the point is. Let’s move on to Tiger Woods, he cheated on his wife, drove while intoxicated several times and forced several young girls to have abortions so he could save face, a real hero though. It’s funny that people so easily disregard people’s actions if they’re good at something. I’m not here to shame anyone, I don’t know if it’s right or wrong but I don’t really agree with the idolisation of truly terrible people. I mean, how many footballers have been arrested for drink-driving? How many have been caught cheating on their wives? If you cheat on your wife you’re a scumbag, I don’t care what you say. The privilege extends to the courts sometimes as well, both Messi and Ronaldo have been taken to court over tax evasion, Marcos Alonso literally killed someone by driving under the influence and got away with it essentially scot free. It’s not just sports stars though, what about Caitlyn Jenner? Imagine literally murdering someone and receiving an award for Woman of the Year, the same year… bit nuts if you ask me.
It’s my girlfriend, Katie’s birthday on the 29th, so I thought it might be nice to write about our relationship. We met in 2016 at a pre-formal at the Bot, true romance. Anyway, I was paralytic that night and my Mummy slapped me when I came in because I wasn’t meant to be drinking, obviously. I woke up at like 8am with no memory of the previous night, yeah it was that bad. They were doing a deal, 2 double vodka redbulls for £12, don’t know why I thought that was so good. I went onto Facebook and the only person online was my friend Lara, I texted her saying ‘Katie Leyden’s so great’, she suggested I message Katie. Now, I’d never have the confidence to do this but I was still feeling slightly intoxicated at this stage and Lara had given me advice on what to say. She suggested I say, ‘Hi just wanted to say you looked beautiful last night, marry me. ’ and me, in my semi-drunk state, felt it was appropriate to copy and paste that message and send it. That’s the first message I sent to Katie, she woke up later on and texted me back, we exchanged messages for a few hours, but Katie did try and ignore me a few times. I really did fancy her though and didn’t feel like letting her pass me by. I persevered and created enough conversation to keep her interested for two weeks, at which stage I found out that I’d kissed her that night in the Bot. At this stage, I was grounded but we kept messaging, I had a free house when my parents were away and we kissed and that was it. Made it exclusive and the rest is history. Obviously a lot has changed in almost 5 years, but we are still together. We’ve stayed strong bar a small 2 month blip this time last year. After that little break, we got back together and all has been good since. It’s special to have a relationship with someone the way I have with Katie, she’s a special person. She’ll probably be laughing at this, but if I’m being honest, she says I couldn’t walk five feet without her and it’s true. Katie is the type of person who always speaks her mind, she’s so capable and works so hard it makes me feel like a loser. I think we manage our relationship very well, we never leave a problem untouched, if we ever have an issue we talk it through and come to a compromise. I think that’s been the secret to us staying together, we’ve always been like that and that’s the hard work in a relationship, addressing the issues no matter the circumstance. I appreciate all of the support she gives me and it’s funny, every time we meet someone they always say ‘How do you stick him?’, and I think that’s justified. I’m not easy to stick, I’m a melter and can be an arsehole, admittedly, but we all have our moments. I just can’t imagine what I’d do without Katie and I hope she knows how much she means to me, although I don’t know if she ever can.
Happy 21st Birthday Katie. ❤️
That’s 1,000 folks, see you tomorrow.